Tuesday, November 23, 2010

no titles ... just blogging

i just cant seem to shake this down feeling.

i got pretty bad a couple of weeks ago.  the worst its been in years.  the kind of bad when youd rather not be "here".  i think im coming up and out of that phase.  but im not beyond it completely - and certainly not out of the funk all together. 

the thing that makes "here" better and worth it - lbj.
he is the light in my days 
(although yesterday at 527pm i thought, "really? this was a good idea? having kids?")
he is the light even when im on the couch under my blanket in such a funk that i cant move. 
pbs has been my lifesaver during this down time.  but let me tell you! lbj does know his letters B and C.  so, thank you sesame street.  special thanks to cookie monster.  man, does my kid love you and want to copy everything you do and say.  i wonder if he babysits and/or tutors? i can pay in cookies!

lbj has also taken to kissing all the animals and monsters in his books.  his favorite books for me to read right now are "are you my mother?" and dr. seuss' "ABC".  whenever an animal appears on the page he leans forward and kisses the book. its really adoable.  except it makes me sad that hes become really stingy with kisses for mommy.  really?  maybe if i let my lips chap out, theyll be rough as paper, and he'll want to kiss that nonsense.

hes doing all kinds of other funny stuff.  like last night -  he was walking around the room hunched over and lifting his legs really high.  we thought maybe he was trying to be all "stealth-like" sneaking up on grandma. (heres a hint lbj - when you are out in the open area, anyone and everyone can see you.  youre going to have learn how to hide better, or else youll never pull a successful prank)

things that are not funny - his incessant touching of the xbox and wii.  and looking over his shoulder at me right before he does it - just to test my patience.  in my funk, i havent been very good about being consistent with discipline.  so i suppose its not all his fault.  sometimes i let him touch the buttons. and sometimes i dont. hows he supposed to know what kind of mood im in?  i mean, couldnt he just learn to mind read - just the way i expect nathan to?

heres lbj lighting it up



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