Wednesday, February 16, 2011

hey! dont you know, im supposed to be in charge!?

i am exhausted. potty training is hard work.  and whether or not lbj is ready is not the question anymore.  it is "am i ready?" 

i have to be a freakin vigilante doing this.  heres the thing. lbj is really independent.  he tells me "byebye" all the time to get me to go away when he is doing something that he wants to do alone.  i think its hilarious and cute.  but he has me trained people.  that behavior has led me to believe that i can be working on homework or even (even!) blog while he is playing in his very own play room ... the one he got because he is so independent and needed his own space.  do you hear me, blog?!?  this kid owns me! and has manipulated me! and hes not even speaking in full sentences!!!  ive been had, i tell you.

back to potty training.  hes been giving me what i thought were signs ... like saying peepee and then actually going.  i mean, if thats not a sign, what is? so we purchased ourselves a potty ... one that sits on the floor, or that you can put on the toilet.  it was cheap.  they had all different kinds, and they got up to $40.  do you know that you can buy a real adult size toilet at costco for $80.  you want me to spend $40 on a plastic tupperware bowl???? i think not.

last week in the afternoons, id let lbj roam naked.  he would sit on the potty, lean forward and strain his little heart out.  it was so funny.  i thought, holy smokes, as soon as he gets something to come out, he'll be set!

then the weekend happened, and we were out and about and busy.

and then monday i was too tired to potty train, after a hard weekend.  and yesterday ... i forgot what happened yesterday, but now its been 5 days without sitting on a potty.

we get up. the diaper comes off. and i sit on the couch. he asks to watch "cars" (again. for the 5th time in 3 days).  we turn it on, i bring up my homework.  but every five seconds i have to look up to be sure hes not peeing on the carpet.  every 10 seconds im asking " do you have to peepee in the potty"  in that singsong voice i always have when speaking to children.  and every 10 seconds he laughs at me. literally.  apparently his mother saying peepee is hilarious.  

i cant get any work done. and im stressing out about the possibility that not only will he pee on my carpet, but that he'll do it so fast, that i wont notice. and in two hours ill be walking somewhere and feel wetness beneath me feet. gross. 

this is hard work!!

finally 3 hours later hes in my lap, watching cars (sixth viewing), and i feel a trickle.  "oh boy! lets pee in the potty" we are running to the toilet. hes holding his pee. what a good boy not to pee on his mum.  we sit on the toilet. and nothing.  he smiles at me and gets off and runs.  i sit on the edge of the couch wondering what to do, when i hear it.  the stream. on the wall behind me.  at least its on the tile. i run to pick him up and deliver him to the toilet.  where he smiles and gets up.  gosh, that smile kills me!

i put him in a diaper.  i cant handle this nonsense.  

well ... no more. ill let you know when I'M ready for YOU to go peepee in the potty. 
thank you very much.

2 comments:

Roylance Fam said...

HAha..nicole you crack me up:) Hope all is well on ur end of the world..i love reading all ur stories, you are such a great writer:)HUGS!!

DeeBoyzMomma said...

LMAO! That is hilarious. Perfect capture of a mommy's experience with potty training. :)